1.) My cat started biting out her fur in giant clumps. She pulls so much of her fur out that sometimes when I look outside in the chair she sits in, I think there is another cat with her.
2.) Every single person who lives in my house is allergic to cat hair.
3.) I spoke at a women's conference last week. I was terrified and exhilarated, but the point is I did it. I conquered my anxiety. I am still awesome.
4.) I sat through the strangest parent- teacher conference ever. I wish I could detail the level of hilarity it took on, but if I tell you, I'd have to kill you.
5.) For the second year in a row I rode in the Tour de Scottsdale 30 mile bike race with one of my best friends, then the next day I went biking again, hiked, and finished with a weight class at the gym.
6.) My back hurts.
7.) And finally, someone overheard a person say she didn't personally like me.
Hold on. What? WHY?
That's what I asked when this person told me that she was sitting in a meeting with other colleagues of mine and someone told the entire group she didn't personally like me. In the words of Stephanie Tanner from Full House which I've been watching way too much of......how rude.
I was all wide-eyed for a second and then I realized this: Who F&kin Cares.
That's right! Who F$#kin Cares. I can actually name like 10 reasons that person might hate me right off the top of my head. There are some legit reasons someone might not like me. So, whatever.
The person then asked me, "Does this hurt your feelings? I was worried it would make you feel bad."
I thought about it for a second and after the initial jolt, I can finally say: I don't give a shit. After all those years of lying about it, I can honestly say, at age 39 that I really don't care if you don't like me. I wanted to skip around and high five people because it felt like such a moment of clarity in my life. I don't care what you think. For real. I'm not even going to plot revenge against you like I usually would. I feel grown up. Evolved. It's so liberating and wonderful. Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Even two years ago if I heard someone didn't like me I would have been very hurt and possibly felt rejected. I might have avoided that person or tried to act differently to get them to like me. Not anymore, baby. Some people are just not going to like you. So what.
For some reason women think they have to be likable to everyone. But I can tell you now, I'm not for everyone. I'm a little loud, a lot opinionated, and sometimes outrageous. I kind of like those things about myself, but I can see how someone else would hate it. And I don't care. I'm not even going to tell you to Fck off because that would imply emotion and I super duper don't mind if you personally dislike me. I'm okay with it. I'll even shake your hand.
My entire presentation at that women's conference was about moving past assumptions that hold us back, mostly, what we perceive others think of us. We take those qualities we think people might hate about us and we suppress or change them to make other people like us more. Well, to hell with those people because the only way you will be able to create your most authentic version of yourself, is by being yourself. When you unabashedly take the risk to unravel yourself in front of others, there is a letting go that happens. You'll attract people you want in your life and the people you don't want won't like you anyway!
Now, I'm going to brush my second cat off my patio chair.